As the old adage claims, necessity is the mother of invention, and while this may be true for most of mankind’s greatest achievements, from gravity-defying bridges to the mighty aeroplane, sometimes things are just created because, fuck it, why the hell not?
Surfboard wax that has been subtly scented with the colonel’s famous eleven secret herbs and spices, falls firmly into the latter category.
Purveyors of fried chicken (and the best burger you’ll find this side of Kentucky) KFC has just announced a collection of Australian-centric merchandise for the Aussie market, with proceeds going to support the KFC Youth Foundation. 90 percent of KFC’s employees are aged 25 or younger, so supporting Australian youths is an important topic for Yum! Brands, of which the affectionately nick-named “dirty bird” is a subsidiary.
The line of products, which includes 5 collectible enamel pins, track pants, shirts, and strange knitwear for your head, also has a sweet pair of budgie smugglers, so you can show off your, erm, one piece feed (?) next time you’re hitting the beach.
And speaking of the beach, there’s also a one-off surfboard (which has already sold for a handsome AU $3,000), named “The Harland” after Colonel Harland Sanders, who famously scrawled his recipe for K-Fry in the back of the kitchen door at his original restaurant in Kentucky, before going on to create one of the most successful fast food franchises in the world.
It is unclear whether or not the Colonel liked to get shacked when he wasn’t manning the pressure cooker, but given Kentucky is landlocked, we very much doubt it. Either way, this is your opportunity to get your hands on the sticky stuff and cover your log with wax that smells halfway between their famous fried chicken and their excellent hot chips. More than one person in the Man of Many office today suggested that this would surely attract sharks, as even apex predators who are used to hunting for their dinner would surely have trouble resisting the delicious flavours of The Colonel’s finest.
Whether you’re after some limited edition KFC-inspired surfboard wax, a set of tracky-dacks with everybody’s favourite deep fried snacks, or a pair of socks to show the world your love of all things Zinger, KFC has got you covered with this sweet collection of merch. And with all proceeds going to a good cause, you can get around town reppin’ the limited collection of gear with a sense of social responsibility, too.
It’s finger lickin, kickflippin’ good.