Gwyneth Paltrow has been roasted on Reddit after her wellness company, Goop released its ultra-luxe Christmas gift guide. Users of the social media platform have had a field day poking fun at the curated list of items, which included everything from a USD$15,000 (AU$22,700) 24k Gold dildo to a USD$40,000 (AU$60,000) a-night stay at Fiji eco-resort Turtle Island.
While at Man of Many, we appreciate life’s luxuries, we also recognise that most people don’t possess a bank balance reminiscent of royalty. In light of this, if you’re seeking more reasonably priced ideas for the upcoming holiday season, we invite you to peruse our Christmas gift guides instead.
MORE: This Candle Actually Smells Like a Butthole
As soon as the Goop Christmas list made its way to Reddit, users went unsurprisingly wild in the comments. Gwyneth was quickly labelled as “hilariously out of touch” and a “tone-deaf wealthy person”, but you had to dig a little deeper to find the comedic gold.
‘Unless that vibrator has me seeing visions like that’s so raven I can’t begin to understand the price”, one person wrote.
“There’s a ton of expensive shit on here but ‘find your perfect gong with the help of a gong master’ was truly the most bizarre,” another added.
Speaking on the 60-grand Fiji holiday, one person wrote: “God that made me cringe. Like, are the Fijians getting paid an equitable amount of that 30,000-ish a day for being part of the tourist experience? Just gross.”
“Your favorite pretentious corn husk has released a holiday gift list that makes even Neiman Marcus’s Christmas book say “In this economy!??!”, another penned.
“If someday comes out and says that this entire persona was an intricate piece of performance art, I would support her getting an Oscar just for that,” commented another.
To give you a little context, here’s Goop’s full list below:
- ALEXANDRA LLEWELLYN Poppies and Crane Backgammon Set (USD$14,580)
- TABAYER Large Pavé Oera Bracelet (USD$29,400)
- TURTLE ISLAND Island Rental in Fiji (USD$39,500 a night)
- CHEZ PLUIE Antique Escargot Picks Chez Pluie (USD$567)
- SAUER Zaha One-Diamond Ring (USD$19,800)
- ROYAL DELFT Hand-Painted Tulip Vase Pyramid (USD$16,752)
- PELORUS X OCEANSKY 7-Day Airship Cruise to the North Pole (Price Upon Request)
- VRAM Chrona Mini Link Necklace (USD$21,200)
- WALDENPlanar Studio Gong and Stand (USD$2,000)
- ASTRO.GONG.YOGA Gong Exploration Workshop (USD$200)
- ORREFORS Street 53-Piece Street Bar Cart by Jan Johansson (USD$10,000)
- REGALIS Parmigiano Reggiano DOP, Aged 24 Months (USD$396)
- DEN Custom Cabin (USD$200,000 to USD$1,000,000)
- BOMBER Basquiat Black Crown Ascent 95P Skis (USD$2,250)
- CASORO Custom-Built Ruby Jewelry Safe (USD$11,100)
- ELEVEN Executive Producer Experience at Flóki Studios, Deplar Farm (Price Upon Request)
- CHANEL Roller Skates (USD$5,125)
- MASA DESIGNS Large Footed Swirl Platter (USD$$850)
- MODPOOLS Customized Modpool (from USD$28,500)
- BUSHTOPS Roving Safari (from USD$$30,200 a day)
- THE SHOP AT THE BROAD Keith Haring Radiant Heart LED Neon Sign (USD$1,099)
- HERMÈS Cavaletti Doghouse (USD$1,925)
- THE WELL BAY HARBOR ISLANDS Residence 4 at The Well Bay Harbor Islands (from USD$4,450,000)
- ASI WIND’S INNER CIRCLE Magic Show Tickets (from USD$120)
- ZERO-G Zero-G Experience (from USD$9,070)
In another Reddit thread, one commenter wrote: “Man i’d love all these gifts, imagine roller skating around Turtle Island while slapping a solid gold dildo against a gong”. Another sarcastically said: “Imagine gifting a gong without a gong workshop. that would be so embarrassing.”
To be fair to Paltrow, there were other gift guides with more affordable products on the list. Perhaps this was all an elaborate marketing scheme by the company to get free PR. After all the 51-year-old went viral after she released a candle that smelled like her vagina. Genius. Well, here’s some more free press Gwyneth.
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