There are many lists out there with the most popular baby names in Australia, but who cares if you name your kid Oliver or Willow? They’re a dime a dozen. We want to know what happens when you throw in a couple of random constants to make your kid unique. Yeh, we’re looking at you, Diezel.
With that in mind, we’ve compiled a list of the Most Bogan Baby Names. If you put aside the fact that the kids named with these atrocities will undoubtedly be tormented for life, it’s pretty damn funny to name your kid something rubbish like Dagger. At least he’ll never have to worry about unreasonable expectations. Whether you’re here for a laugh or looking for some inspiration for when your little tike pops out, one thing’s for sure: there’s no denying that Australia’s got some red hot culture.
Top Bogan Baby Names for Girls
- Carryn – Let’s face it, it hasn’t been the best year for Karens, but as disgusting as their actions have been, nobody deserves to be named ‘Carryn’. The awkward twist on the classic Kazza isn’t fooling anyone. This is one name that needs to be retired this year.
- Chablis – In case you want to let everyone know you’re an alcoholic, Chablis is the way to go. This wine-inspired eponym is about as rancid as a two-day-old Coolabah cask left in the sun. “I’ve chuckled at Shiraz, Chardonnay and Shardonné over the years, but I hadn’t heard of Chablis until I met one in the flesh a few weeks ago,” KidSpot’s Sabrina Rogers-Anderson wrote. “The only problem was that she didn’t pronounce it “cha-BLEE” like the French wine region, but “TCHA-bliss”. Oh boy, was it ever hard to contain my glee.”
- Corona – Honestly, what are people thinking? “You knew there would be at least one virus-inspired name on this list, right?” Rogers-Anderson said. “While there were countless choices, some of the other appellations – such as COVID, Lockdown and Sanitiser – were used by parents in foreign countries who may have reasons I don’t understand for choosing them. But Corona has had a boost in popularity worldwide, so here she is in all her glory.”
- Graceland – We love Elvis as much as the next guy, but we certainly wouldn’t be opting for Graceland as a name. Naming your child after an iconic celebrity does check out. Naming your kid after their house? Not so much.
- Honestlee – “Honestlee, this hurts my head,” Rogers-Anderson wrote. “I’m already not a huge fan of the next-gen virtue names, but a misspelt one? I’m out.”
- Jezzabella – This isn’t a positive word. According to the Hebrew Bible, Jezebel was one of the original bad girls, so it makes little sense to name your child this, but alas, popularity is rising. “Trying to jazz up her name with a double “Z” and a modern “-bella” ending is an odd choice in my books,” Rogers-Anderson said.
- Jinx – “I get that times are strange, but naming your daughter after a curse or a plague will probably not make things better. I’m not superstitious, but this is too much even for me.”
- Jumelle – Beautiful, expressive, Jumelle. Like a French sneeze, this one is exotic and slightly unexpected. “The thing with choosing random foreign words as baby names, because they sound cool, is that sometimes their meanings aren’t fit for a Bubba. “Jumelle” means “twin girl” in French,” Rogers-Anderson said.
- Klowee – The strange spelling of names is something we thoroughly enjoy. While we all thought Honestee would be hard to beat, Klowee has topped it.
Best Bogan Baby Names for Boys
- Pistol – We love a strong name, and what could be stronger than naming your child after an instrument of death? Just skip the Bruces, Johns, Dougs and Marks and go straight to PISTOL.
- Axe – Apparently, violence is in this year. “I was already mildly shocked when monikers such as Blaze and Diesel started appearing a few years ago, but these are next lev,” KidSpot’s Rogers-Anderson wrote. “Do the owners have any choice but to become criminals? I mean, they can’t exactly be schoolteachers or Supreme Court Justices.”
- Bamboo – This is a strange one. “Just because rapper Big Boi did it many years ago doesn’t mean you should too. It’s been well-established that celebrities are not a reputable resource for baby naming, and this instance is no different.
- Chaton – A fantastic example of a foreign word that sounds cute but doesn’t make any sense. “It means “kitten” in French, for crying out loud! Name your son Chaton, and he’s guaranteed to change it to Axe or Blade when he’s old enough.”
- Dagger – Forget Axe and Pistol; why not Dagger? A bit of hand-to-hand combat in name format is way more aggressive and manly.
- Jaguar – There was definitely an animal theme in this year’s list of Australia’s most bogan baby names, and based on how successful Toger King was a few months back, we’re wholly unsurprised Jaguar is a hit.
- Jaxtynn – Want to jazz up your son’s name? Slip a couple of extra Xs and Ys in to make it pop. Easy done
- Jevin: “Hmmm, OK. We’re over, Kevin, so we’re just going to swap in a “J.” We may as well start naming children Febecca and Wavid then, hey?”
- Mordax – This one is just straight perplexing. “Uroctonus mordax is otherwise known as the California forest scorpion,” Rogers-Anderson said. “I don’t mind a good old stinging insect, but I’m not sure it makes for a good baby name.”
- Rad – If you choose a word that means “cool” for your kid, pick one that’s more modern. How about Chillax, Chill AF or Awesomeballs? You’re welcome!
- Tygrrr – Oh, I see what you did there! It’s an onomatopoeia! The end of the word sounds like the growling of a tiger! Newsflash: your kid will hate it. Change it now.
The Rise of Bogan Baby Names
Bogans, often identified as the Australian version of ‘red-neck,’ have a storied history deeply intertwined with Australian identity and culture. Originally, these names were associated with blue-collar workers, embodying a sense of humour. They often simply added an “-o” or and “-ie” to the end of any name. Think, “Tommo’. Over time, what may have started as playful or even pejorative nicknames became badges of pride among younger generations.
From the classics like Barry and Shazza to more modern twists like Brayden and Tayla, bogan names have evolved significantly. The advent of social media and global culture has seen these names incorporate more creative spellings and even elements of popular culture, demonstrating the dynamic nature of this uniquely Australian phenomenon.
How to Choose the Right Bogan Name
Choosing the right bogan name involves balancing uniqueness with practicality. While it’s tempting to go for a name that stands out, it’s essential to consider how it will be perceived in various contexts, such as schooling and employment.
Understanding the cultural connotations and potential stereotypes associated with bogan names is crucial. A name that’s too unique might be memorable but could lead to unwanted attention or judgment.
The Impact of a Bogan Name
Having a bogan name can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it can provide a strong sense of identity and pride; conversely, it might lead to prejudice or stereotyping. Balancing these aspects is key to understanding the impact of these names on an individual’s life.
With their rich connotations and unique flair, Bogan names are a significant part of Australia’s cultural tapestry. They reflect the nation’s vibrant, irreverent spirit and its evolving identity. Do they spark pride, humour, or something else?
