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Ask any group of parents at Saturday morning footy or a Sunday BBQ what their biggest fears for the future are, and they’ll invariably tell you a version of the same thing: social media and the digital hellscape of algorithms, and how it will affect their kids, is what keeps them up at night.
Modern parents can’t avoid screens and devices. We use them to organise every aspect of our daily lives – never too far away from a smartphone ‘just in case’. It’s a habit we’re passing down to our kids. Devices are where our kids will learn to write and retrieve information, and how they’ll make and keep friends. Meanwhile, every modern parent feels some level of guilt about screen time – both their children’s and their own. But what parent hasn’t just popped their kids in front of the TV in order to get five minutes of peace, or given them an iPad at the pub in the hope of actually completing a story from beginning to end?
We are terrified of our screens and their effects, but unable to escape them.
It’s a conundrum Walkley award-winning journalist and documentarian Marc Fennell faced first-hand when he put his kids in front of YouTube in the family living room one evening while he cooked dinner.
“I came back 20 minutes and the screen was literally playing a Joe Rogan clip,” Fennell says in the latest episode of Man of Many’s parenting podcast, Daddies. “Somehow with nobody clicking anything, they’ve gone from Pokémon and Minecraft videos to Joe Rogan spouting about weak men and weak times.”
This experience was the genesis of State of Man, Fennell’s new three-part ABC documentary series, in which he comes face-to-face with the ‘manosphere’ in all its different forms.
The Algorithmic Pipeline: How Fitness Content Turns Toxic
By now, the manosphere is a well-known digital problem. Young men seeking validation and guidance are directed by algorithms to male content creators who preach the value of hard work, self-sufficiency, and confidence. Sounds harmless, until that same algorithm sends these young men further down a rabbit hole of extreme body dysmorphia, toxic misogyny, and right-wing extremism. What begins as a search for validation and status quickly morphs into something much darker.
For State of Man, Fennell conducted his own experiment, setting up social media profiles of young men, then leaving them to run without interaction – no likes, no comments, no shares. Within three weeks, this imaginary young man was being fed a steady diet of hatred and extremism, with a healthy dose of AI slop thrown in.
“When you’re a young guy going online… you’re looking for fitness content, dating content, money content… How do I look good? How do I feel good? What are the markers of success and status?” Fennell says. “That’s a fork in the road there, right? Where you can have a healthy relationship with fitness and working out, or it can be this vehicle towards something much more toxic.”
The results of this dynamic are now playing out in classrooms and courtrooms across Australia. Research from the eSafety Commissioner reveals that over half of young Australians aged 12–17 regularly encounter violent content or online hate, with educators reporting an unprecedented rise in classroom misogyny and radicalised ‘manosphere’ rhetoric. But this digital hostility doesn’t stay behind a screen. Meanwhile, an intimate partner kills a woman every 11 days on average in Australia – proving that when algorithms push young men from innocent self-improvement toward radicalised misogyny, online banter becomes a direct feeder for a real-world national crisis.
Why the ‘Manosphere’ Threatens Women, Not Just Boys
That rabbit hole is leading to a huge disconnect between men and women. What men think women want is vastly different from what women say they actually look for in a partner. This disconnect isn’t just a matter of misguided teenage angst; it is a fundamental misreading of what healthy relationships actually require.
Research from Man of Many’s own Male Confidence Index reveals a stark divide in expectations: when asked what women look for in a partner, men overwhelmingly cited traditional markers like physical strength, protection, and dominance.
Women, however, overwhelmingly prioritised empathy, understanding, and open communication. When algorithms feed young men a hyper-masculine playbook that actively rejects empathy, it creates an environment where hostility replaces connection. This shifts the narrative entirely away from isolated “teenage boy problems” into a broader societal imperative – because, as Fennell points out on the podcast, if 50% of the population is trapped in an identity crisis fuelled by digital outrage, the other 50% is actively in danger.
” is just as important, if not more important, for my daughter. Because the manosphere is targeting young boys and young men, but those men interact with women.”
That disconnect is becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy—the more young men fail to connect with women, the further they retreat into the self-saucing pudding of the manosphere.
How Parents Can Fight Back Against the Algorithm
At Man of Many, our mission is to empower men to invest in themselves and their communities. We’re also a team of parents navigating screen time with our own kids. So, how do we actually counter the pull of the manosphere?
It’s tempting to treat a technical problem with a technical fix, but blocking devices, tech bans, and spy software are band-aid solutions. They don’t touch the root cause. Instead, Fennell outlines three practical steps for parents:
- Inspect digital footprints together: Secretly checking search histories breeds deceit and drives kids deeper into hidden corners of the web. Reviewing online activity together—backed by an ironclad rule never to check unless they are present—replaces policing with trust and shared accountability.
- Bring in external male mentors: Parents and teachers can’t be the only guides. When teenage pushback sets in, external figures—coaches, instructors, youth leaders, or uncles—act as circuit breakers, modelling grounded, real-world masculinity outside the family dynamic.
- Prioritise presence over formal talks: Breakthroughs rarely happen during forced, uncomfortable sit-down conversations. Connection usually happens through simple, shared presence—sitting side-by-side or doing daily tasks together, letting them know support is there when they’re ready to talk.
“Real-life people matter,” Fennell says, emphasizing the impact of mentors while acknowledging that parents also need to reflect on their own screen habits. “One of the things I’ve had to get comfortable with is the idea that simply being present with each other while you’re doing life… knowing that you’re there is what matters right now.”
Redefining Masculinity: The ‘Don’t Be a Dickhead’ Rule
Reversing an algorithmic ecosystem built over decades won’t happen overnight, but the first step is rejecting the rigid playbook pushed by online creators. Real manhood isn’t measured by physical dominance, strength, or bank balances.
“The manosphere actually has a very strict criteria about what a good man is,” Fennell says. “Jacked, capable of violence, make your first million by the time you’re 25… It makes you feel like if you’re anything less than that, you’re a lower form of life.”
Anyone living in the real world – rather than watching life through a 24/7 stream – knows character isn’t forged in a comment section. It’s built by navigating life’s everyday friction, setbacks, and responsibilities. There’s no quick fix sold by a YouTuber pushing supplements.
Inner strength matters more than vanity muscles. Healthy relationships rank above a hoard of wealth. And empathy is a far more compelling trait than dominance. For Fennell, it all distils into one simple rule: Don’t be a dickhead.
“Can you be somebody that builds and doesn’t burn?” asks Fennell. “Can you be somebody that encourages people rather than discourages them?”
Need Support? Services Are Available
If this article brings up difficult feelings or if you, a friend, or a family member are struggling with mental health, relationships, or online safety, support is available 24/7:
- MensLine Australia:
1300 78 99 78— Free, confidential telephone and online counseling service specifically for men with emotional health and relationship concerns.- Lifeline:
13 11 14— 24/7 crisis support and suicide prevention services.- Beyond Blue:
1300 22 4636— Support for anxiety, depression, and mental health.- 1800RESPECT:
1800 737 732— National domestic, family, and sexual violence counseling service.- eSafety Commissioner: Report serious online abuse, image-based abuse, or cyberbullying directly to the national regulator.
In an emergency or if you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call 000.
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