Tarocash suit? $199.
Lime green tie? $19.
White faux-snakeskin shoes that are inexplicably both pointy and chisel-toed? I dunno like $70? We’ve obviously never bought a pair.
The look on your high-school sweetheart’s face when you win a whopping $793,000 on the back of a $10 multi, right after she’s dumped you at Crown Casino?
You know how it goes…
And this is the very story of a man named Kenny, who was told whilst on a date with who he thought was the woman of his dreams on Tuesday at Crown Casino during the Melbourne Cup that it clearly wasn’t working, and that she wanted to bail on the day of drinking and betting early.
A $10 #MelbourneCup First Four that turned into a $793,000 win? One punter's eyes were glued to the result of the protest because it meant a MONSTER payout! ? https://t.co/wzyYKeoAM6 pic.twitter.com/7G7ljJSkRE
— Sportsbet.com.au (@sportsbetcomau) November 5, 2019
Little did she know, however, that the $10 ticket Kenny had in his pocket (well, on his phone app, it’s 2019, people), to pick the first-four runners in the race, was soon to be worth a cool AUD$793,000.
“I was completely oblivious. The girl I was out with said, ‘Did you win?’ and I said, ‘Oh, I put those horses, but I don’t know, I’ll check later’,” Kenny told former AFL stars Garry Lyon and Tim Watson on SEN Breakfast yesterday.
Kenny wants to buy a place on the Gold Coast after this Melbourne Cup haul, thanks for chatting to us ? pic.twitter.com/oKHLCEdbWq
— MMM's Hot Breakfast (@mmmhotbreakfast) November 6, 2019
“I had another couple of drinks, and she pretty much told me, ‘Listen, I don’t really feel it. You know, this isn’t going to go anywhere. I want to get the five o’clock train’ and I said, ‘Ah well, no worries, thanks for being honest’.
“I thought at least the day’s not over, I’ll open up the Sportsbet account because there’s still a couple of races to go in the Majors. I open up the account and I suddenly started screaming. I’m seeing all these numbers mate and I’m, like, speechless, I’m gasping. I’m, like, ‘Oh my effing god, oh my god’ and everyone at the restaurant is looking at me like, ‘What’s wrong with this clown?’”
Kenny, who reportedly works as a carpenter, has no plans to squander his winnings, however, and has already discussed what he plans to do with the cash, saying: “I went back to the Crown after the date got on the train, had a couple of drinks, took a taxi home. I haven’t spent a cent.
“I’m going to keep my job and I’m going to go back to work. I’m going to buy a house on the Gold Coast and happy days.”