Trying to find the best strip clubs in Sydney is not as easy as it once was. The Emerald City’s copped a fair bit of flak lately for being boring, and it’s not entirely unwarranted. With the notorious lockout laws strangling the city’s nighttime economy, and venues closing left right and centre, it’s not exactly the playground it once was.
But that’s not to say that all hope is lost for a decent night of nudity in old Sydney town. Here we’ve compiled the best venues that serve both alcohol and naked girls, all for a nominal fee. From daggy dives with neon to the classiest gentleman’s clubs, Sydney has it all. You’ve just got to know where to look.
The self-proclaimed “most successful strip club in Australia AND New Zealand” is actually a lot more fun than it might seem on the surface. As western Sydney’s premier destination venue for T ‘n’ A, they genuinely have amassed quite the following since they first opened their doors in 1984, and continue to tittilate the masses with some of the best looking girls this side of Sweden
It’s a little bit dive bar, a little bit titty-bar (very American in style), with a killer food menu, great drinks, a bottle shop, loads of private areas and even a kebab cart for when it gets late (the Sefton Playhouse opens until 4am). This is a genuinely fun place; even if you’re not out for a long, boozy buck’s you’re guaranteed a good time, at any time of day.
54 Clapham Rd, Sefton 2162
One of Sydney’s best small strip clubs, Velvet Underground’s greatest strength is the relaxed atmosphere and friendly staff, who all help contribute to your experience (of looking at tits). Girls are all elegant, fun and the private rooms are intimate, for very sexy private shows.
There’s a well-stocked bar, and just the right amount of chairs stage-side, for getting up close and personal with the dancers, without it feeling too much like a sausage-fest. Tip big here and you’ll be rewarded.
64 Clarence St, Sydney CBD 2000
One of Sydney’s classier venues, Men’s Gallery has been a stalwart in the Sydney strip club scene for a long time, catering to the masses, a mixed crowd and never compromising on the quality of performers who grace their stage. Great choice for a stag do, or even just after work beers in the city with a difference.
92 Pitt St, Sydney CBD 2000
Minx is Sydney’s best strip club if you’re looking for something a little more professional. Designed with the high-spending corporate set in mind, this is less of a buck’s night venue and more the place to go at the end of signing that big deal (or merger, or whatever it is you corporate folks do). With a modern interior and plenty of dark woods, it’s a masculine room–as well suited for sipping single malts as it is spending quality time with some of Sydney’s most attractive private dancers. They also do a “Wolf of Pitt St” EOFY party each year, for the bankers and wankers who like to celebrate tax time with tits.
Downstairs, 72 Pitt St, Sydney CBD 2000
Housed within the Illinois hotel on Parramatta Rd, Dancers Cabaret has recently undergone a huge refit, and is now the premier strip club in Sydney’s inner west, and one of the best strip clubs in Sydney overall. This is a great one to visit if you’re got a bigger crew and don’t want to have to make the trek all the way to the city, to still get a five star experience.
15 Parramatta Rd, Five Dock 2046
One of the original titty bars on the notorious “Golden Mile”, Showgirls is everything you’d look for in a strippos. Sticky carpets, neon, plenty of mirrors and, of course, an abundance of female flesh. Definitely worth a visit; if the rest of Kings Cross is anything to go by, it won’t be there for much longer.
39 Darlinghurst Rd, Potts Point 2011
Like gourmet food with a side of gratuitous nudity? Look no further. Twin Peeks has long been a favourite for buck’s nights and sleazy corporate events, for its fun segue between fancy restaurant and erotic dancers. Oh, and ask for their dessert special. Trust us.
134 Forbes St, Woolloomooloo 2011
Opening at 10am, the Petersham Inn is one of Sydney’s newer strip club additions, which operates outside the CBD lockout zone. A bevy of very cute girls dominate the stage (when they’re not pouring beers and liaising with the clientele), there’s pool, sports on the big screens (including Main Boxing and UFC matches), and a great playlist sets the mood for a fun time all round. Being a pub, they also do food, which is perfect if you want to settle in for a big night of babes, beers and Big Buck Hunter (we’re assuming they have one. It looks like that kinda place).
386 Parramatta Rd, Petersham 2049
The Riverview Hotel
Tempe, a suburb best know for having a tip, a giant Salvos and .. nope that’s about it … is also home to the Riverview Hotel, a dive bar on the river that also boasts hot girls and cold beer. There is a train station nearby, so if you’re after a strip club that’s not in the heart of the city, or just an adventure with a good story, it’s easily accessible.
900 Princes Hwy, Tempe 2044